Situational Responses

By Mr Mustapha Louznadji
Inspector of National Education

Regain Lost Self-Confidence


 How to Regain Your Lost Self-Confidence

   There are many instances in life where your confidence is hit hard. Sometimes you overcome life's hardness, sometimes you get overwhelmed. Sometimes your courage and confidence sees you through, but sometimes your self-confidence gets a beating. However, the point here to remember is that "Nobody can hurt you without your consent." The problem is not as important as the impact it had on you, rather the impact that YOU let the problem create on you. “In life pain is inevitable but suffering is optional,” as the saying goes. It's purely your choice, and whether you choose to bounce back or suffer is entirely your prerogative.

   There can be many reasons that your self-confidence is hurt. You may have had a critical situation and now are heading for depression. There's definitely a lot of pain involved in any situation. But you don't necessarily have to suffer. You must arise and resolve to get back your confidence.

    Try to look at the brighter side;

    If you have been laid off, it would be okay to feel bad about it for a day or two but not more. Experiencing a particular situation at home or in classroom could be a awful thing, but it does not mean the end of the world. Who knows it might be a blessing in disguise. Maybe you have got some time to review your life, get aware of where you are going Have a look around you, get aware of those who love you and who don’t want to see you in this situation. Have a look at your likes and hobbies which you could not develop because of pressures of your job. Maybe this is an opportunity to start afresh and live your life a new way with your abilities and aptitude.

    Stop comparing yourself with other people. Stop looking at those who seem too happy and comfortable to you from a distance. Stop comparing their comfort with your suffering. This will only frustrate you further. Focus on yourself and your family and make every effort to feel strong whenever you are feeling down.. Self-pity is very addictive and capable of destroying lives.

     If you want to raise your self confidence or self esteem then the first thing you need to consider is the one who stands by you, who is sharing your anxieties and worries, who cares and who is doing his best to help you gain your lost self-confidence.

     Finally, I would advise you to take a little time each day to tell yourself that you love yourself. Stand in front of the mirror and look yourself in the eye and tell yourself that you love yourself. Doing this will bring all of your negative thoughts, feelings and beliefs about yourself to the surface; you will certainly smile and feel happy. This approach takes some time, but if you are consistent you will begin to feel your self confidence growing…


                                                                  Thomas Bekkar (Adapted)